Finding Your Team in Unexpected Places
Recently, I decided to take advantage of a weight-training program offered at my gym. The class is at 11:30 in the morning, which means most of the people I normally work out with are at work and can’t attend.
So, I showed up for the first class by myself. When I walked in, I quickly realized that the class consisted of me and about six high school senior athletes.
Huh.
There I was, the one 60-plus-year-old in a room full of 17- and 18-year-olds. I definitely felt a little out of place. But I wasn’t deterred, so I stayed, picked up the weights, and got to work.
That was about three weeks ago. Something interesting has happened since then. I now feel like I am part of a team.
We lift together. We stretch together. We encourage one another. When someone has a good lift or accomplishes something they have been working toward, we offer congratulations. They support my efforts, and I support theirs. There is a 40-plus-year age difference between us, but during that hour, it really doesn’t matter.
Kudos to our coach, because that doesn’t happen by accident. He has created an environment where a group of high school athletes and one woman old enough to be their grandmother can all feel comfortable working toward their own goals while cheering one another on. And I realized how much I like it.
Years ago, I wrote about the importance of having a peer network, people who provide support, encouragement, perspective, and a sense of belonging. At the time, I was thinking largely about the networks we intentionally build through work, professional organizations, community groups, hobbies, and friendships. For most of my career, I was part of a team. Sometimes I was a member of the team, and sometimes I was leading it. Today, as a solopreneur, that is different. I have wonderful professional colleagues, clients, friends, and family, but I don’t walk into an office every morning and work alongside the same group of people.
I didn’t realize how much I missed that feeling until I found a little bit of it in an 11:30 weight-training class. There is something energizing about working alongside other people who are trying to get better, even when their goals, ages, and life experiences are completely different from yours.
And, a really important point, it also reminded me that belonging doesn’t require sameness.
Sometimes we limit ourselves by assuming that “our people” should be our age, work in our profession, be at the same stage of life, or have experiences similar to ours. But connection can show up in unexpected places.
Maybe the better question isn’t, “Do I fit in here?”
Maybe it is, “What can I bring to this group, and what might I receive from it?”
You may just discover your next team in a place you never expected.